Stuck in a Quarter Life Crisis

...but the other day i cried. that might sound strange to most, but you have to understand something about me. i don’t cry. at least not as often as other people might. not during sad movies, funerals, goodbyes, break ups, tragedies, nada! that's not to say that i've never cried. i think the last time might have been about four years ago (if you don't include the times when i get teary-eyed chopping onions). part of me doesn't see the point in crying. it seems like waste of time. like instead of crying, you could be working on whatever it is that's bothering you. and i'm never that moved emotionally to cry when something tragic happens, such as 9/11. but the other day, i don't know what came over me, cause i was getting out of the shower and it just happened. not many tears came down, but i'm pretty sure i was crying. i sat in the tub wrapped in my towel for about 20 minutes. i was completely shocked by this. i guess i was making up for lost time cause i couldn’t stop. it was a bit scary for me, but i actually felt a little better afterwards. it’s definitely not something i'd like to happen again. and i'm happy it happened in the privacy of my home and not in the middle of macy's. i think it was built up frustration and anxiety with all that isn't right with my life right now. i've never been in this situation. i've always had a well thought out plan of where i was headed and what i needed to do to get there. then things just kinda got off track. now i don't know what my future holds or what exactly i want to do. and that isn't good. i feel like i should know at this stage of my life. i'm not getting any younger. i've had plenty of time to think it over and i still haven't had that "eureka" moment. this quarter life crisis isn't supposed to go on that long. i need to work and eventually end up in a mid-life crisis like most real adults. how can i possibly do that if i can't get out of this phase first. why is life so fucking hard for me to figure out? everyone else seems to have.