It's about to be a what? GIRL FIGHT!!!
normally, my train ride in the morning is a snooze fest. i go to the platform, wait for the train, and then try to board it without knocking over a group of 
i decided to go in a little earlier today to get some things done...looking back i should've kept my ass in bed. there i was sitting in an almost empty train cart with about 3 other passengers, minding my business as usual. after a stop or two, the door at the end of the cart opens and in walks 4 young black trannies from the adjacent cart. my first thought..."must've just gotten off from their night job street-walking." (stereotyping? yes...do i care? no) so i go back to minding my business when i noticed they decided to sit right across from me. if there is one thing i can’t stand, it’s for strangers to be near me when there is tons of space around. this goes for people who go into a bathroom stall right next to mine in an empty restroom with multiple stalls, people who use a stairmaster right next to mine in an empty gym with many machines to spare, and definitely those who sit near me in an empty room like an airport gate or....a train cart. but i digress. so they were talking amongst themselves when the same door opened again. this time a large group of "queens" come in. there were at least 12 of them. young, black, and flaming. my first thought..."i hope they don't mug me!"now i consider myself to be fairly street smart. i grew up in the 'burbs but spent enough time attending schools and spending time with family in some pretty rough neighborhoods that i think i can handle my own. at least i like to believe i can anyway. but this day i just knew i stood no chance given the circumstances. i was unarmed and outnumbered. and i've never been in a situation where i was surrounded by such a large group like them by myself with no security in sight! kids these days are crazy. 90s babies are children of the corn and i am not about to sit here and lie about not being terrified of them. and i should also add that i am guilty of stereotyping and profiling people. its the "inner racist lapd cop" in me i guess. so back to my story...
as the train progressed, the queens got more animated (what else is new?) and i noticed they were paying a lot of attention to the trannies. i initially thought they were all together because there wasn't a huge lapse of time between when each group came into my cart. a few of the queens started making snide remarks and then one of them started to countdown from 10. i soooooooo wanted to believe that they were counting down to a j-sette routine. wishful thinking on my part. then one of them taps one of the trannies on the leg and says to another queen "who, this one right here?" while another sarcastically complimented one of the other tranny's weave. i quickly glanced over at "her" and could see in her eyes that she was all too familiar with this type of treatment. i felt really bad cause there was nothing i could do to stop it. i don't know what may or may not have taken place earlier to stir up this hostility but i still felt bad. why couldn't they all just get along?
now as we're getting closer to my stop all i can think is..."please don't start no shit while i'm on this mothafuckin' train!" i was practically sitting in the middle of all this drama...on that damn empty cart!!! again...why did they have to sit by me in the first place?!?! anyway, before i knew it a punch was thrown at one of the trannies sitting across the aisle from me and ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE!!! this was by no means an "nba carmelo anthony inspired" slap fest. they were throwing some serious blows at her. and who do you think got pushed into the wall and trapped by all this mayhem? yep...ME!
i grabbed my bags and started screaming like a damn queen myself! it wasn't some high-pitched "white girl running through the woods in a scary movie" scream. if you heard me you would've thought i was evoking the spirit of wayman from 'a low down dirty shame'! as punches were being thrown and wigs and weaves were being snatched off, one of the queens saw me and put his back towards the scuffle and shielded me just enough so that i could get up and get to the door. all of this took place as we were approaching my damn stop! when the train pulled in, it seemed like it took an eternity for the train conductor to open those doors. i was standing there watching this fight move from the middle of the cart down to the other end and back towards me.
when the doors opened you would've thought i had wings attached because i damn near flew up the escalator. i can barely recall touching a single step. it was like i had horse blinders on. all i kept thinking was "get the fuck outta there...do not stop, do not pass go, do not collect your $200!" i do know i told a lady waiting on the platform as i was flying by to not go in that cart. she had this "boo-boo the fool" look on her face. i was thinking..."bitch didn't you hear the words that came outta my mouth...DO NOT GET ON THAT CART". i'm not sure what she did cause i was upstairs in no time. as i was "flying" to the street level i could still hear them all yelling and cursing. i don't know what happened after that. but i do know this...i'll be damn if i ride the train that early in the morning ever again. i will suck it up, drive in and just pay to park if i have to. and to think i thought shit like this only happens on nyc trains.
I'm CRYING @ this story. We have the same space issues, though...I'd love to NOT be spoken to by strangers, and I'd prefer if people didn't sit by me, use things by me, etc, unnecessarily. Move, bish, get out the way.
Posted by
LibraGurl |
1:35 PM
Oh my poor boo!! If any of those trannies woulda touched you I would have flown down there to kick some tuck-dicked ass!!
damn, trannie-fight, the bra-less wonder....yeah I can't wait to visit you and ride the train....
Posted by
Anonymous |
1:41 PM
Wow! That is some wild shyt! I'm glad you are okay.
Posted by
Saun |
11:43 AM
Glad your ok but LMAO at trannies and queens fighting in a subway car. I'm the same way about personal space, can't stand when somebody stands to close to me in a line.
Posted by
modest-goddess |
9:40 PM
Scary story Chica! Glad you are OK and no guns or knives were used, things would've have been WORSE!
Posted by
Julia_Claudine_Deveraux |
11:19 AM
Sounds like a typical train ride through the Bronx, but only it would be between the hours of 1-4am.
Good thing you didn't get hurt being that close to the scuffle.
Posted by
Amar |
3:37 PM
LOL....that is all.
Posted by
S.K. |
4:21 PM
HILARIOUS! Now that's some early mornin' action fo' that azz!
Posted by
Anonymous |
2:34 PM
*picking muself up off the floor*
LMAO! Gyrl, I had some shit like that go down in Atlanta and I almost had to beat this Zesties ass! I pulled a crowbar out of my trunk right downtown on Peachtree St. and told him to try me! Those mafukkas are vicious damnit!
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if there is one thing i can’t stand, it’s for strangers to be near me when there is tons of space around.
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I hate that too! I've told a few people to get away from me and even acted like a loonie so that they will move. Usually blowing spit bubbles or looking around with wide eyes and shivering will make them move. LOL! I;ve mastered the art of the crazies from ridiong the MTA.
And you killed me with the countdoewn to the j-sette! That shit would've been like a 2007 and Beyons West Side Story! LOL!
But I'm happy your safe DaReal
Posted by
Anonymous |
8:34 PM
Oh my gosh Dareal, this story was funny as hell! Scary but funny as hell. This tops every train story I can even think of.
'me'
Posted by
Joi |
8:27 PM
this is hilarious! glad you made it out. teh ghey fights can get pretty ugly fast. look like ladies (kinda) and fight like the mens.
O_O thanks for sharing!
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